Feature: How to Deal with Partner’s Depression


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It is hard to deal with your own and your friend’s depression, but dealing with depression of your partner is way harder. It is common when you hear people say “The thought of having a partner with depression is pushing me away”. Yes, it’s easier to leave your depressed partner than trying to support him or her. It is your choice to leave a partner with depression, but if you think that your partner is worth fighting for check out Vava Women tips on what to do when your partner is depressed.

Educate Yourself

If your partner opens up about struggling with depression the very first step is to get yourself educated on depression. Getting yourself educated on the issues will help you tell the truth from the myths that uneducated people are spreading about depression.

Encourage Your Partner to Seek Help

Of course, your support means a lot to your partner, but if you are not a shrink, you are unlikely to solve this your partner’s problem, as depression needs treatment. The best thing you can do is to encourage your partner to seek professional help and support him or her in it.

Don’t Take Your Partner’s Mood Personally

The hardest part with dealing with your partner’s depression is to learn no to take his or her mood personally. When your partner is having a depressive episode he or she isn’t trying to insult you. The best way to deal with everything they say during those episodes is to think of it as medically as possible.

Monitor Your Partner’s Self-Care

Make sure that your partner isn’t spending all the time in bed. Make sure that your partner is eating healthy. That’s basically how to support a depressed partner. But you shouldn’t overdo it, as a risk to make a transition from supporting to mothering your partner is very high. And as soon as you start mother your partner you stop helping him or her, because mother stands for comfort. That might not be you intention, but that’ how he or she is going to take it.

Be a Safe Place for Your Partner

When it comes to discussing something, mind that you need to be safe and non-judgemental place for him or her. Although you are not a shrink, your partner is most likely to discuss his or her depression with you. What you need to do is listen, ask questions and try to understand what your partner is feeling about it.

Never Use Your Partner’s Depression Against Him or Her

You definitely devote a lot of time and energy for your partner and the temptation to accuse him or her in that is very high, but don’t give in to that temptation. First of all, it was your decision to stay and support your partner. Secondly, making a depressed person feel guilty is definitely not the way to help him or her.

Learn the Warning Signs

Every depressive episode works according to pattern, which makes it easy for you to tell the warning signs of an upcoming episode and prevent it.

Last, but not the least, don’t keep it a private secret. If you want to help your partner you need to seek help and keep yourself healthy and sane.

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