Dear Kate, small penis boyfriend affecting our relationship


Dear Kate,

My boyfriend has a small penis and it’s affecting our relationship. I love him a lot. Actually, I think he is the man for me because he takes good care or me, he is very spiritual and he is a family man. But Kate his penis is small. The truth is I gave cheated on him with someone and I keep going back for more sex because I am just not satisfied at home. What should I do? I don’t love the other guy. I love my boyfriend. But my small penis boyfriend is affecting our relationship. I have everything I need.  Nice home.  Nice car. Two children and enough money to go around.  But at nights it’s horrible. I don’t feel anything when having sex. What should I do?
Dear Winny
Has it ever occurred to you that you might be the one with the problem and not your apparent faithful boyfriend? It could be that your vagina is spacious. Anyway… you claim you love this man who fathered your two children, gave you a nice home, nice car, enough money to go around and everything you need. Yet you confessed to cheating on him. I don’t understand. Many women would do anything to have a man like you have described. You don’t seem to need any advice because you are around already getting your fix on the side. So what advice do you need?  You want me to advise you on whether you should continue to steal love on the side? Or to stop? My only advice to you is to confess to your husband what you’ve been doing and exactly why you’ve been doing it. Let him know the size of his penis is suddenly an issue to you after giving you, two children. As a matter of fact, you should divorce him and release him to be with a woman who won’t hurt him that way.

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  1. Kate, she said boyfriend and not husband. This is the worst piece of advice I’ve read in about two days and it’s probably because two days ago I read a similarly judgemental column from a Jamaican newspaper. There are men who have small penises who know how to use what they have an satisfy their women, there are also those who don’t know how to, but can learn. Shouldn’t your advice then, be something along the lines of having an open and candid conversation with her BOYFRIEND, not husband, about it, before they take the next step in their relationship which may essentially be marriage? The writer wouldn’t have asked advice if she honestly didn’t want to stop cheating or help in finding a solution. There are lots of women out there in unsatisfactory sexual relationships with their partners and a lot of it has to do with lack of communication or being able to communicate what they want.

    • Just to add to annoyed reader’s comment, she also did not state how long they were together and if the kids are actually his kids. I’m pretty sure nothing is wrong with her vagina as she has no problem having sex with the other guy she is cheating with. I was once in a relationship with a guy who was very aware of his small penis. As small as my pinky finger.. Though my boy was little he was talawah

    • Its not that, women dont want to tell the truth because:
      1. It makes her look bad.
      2. If she’s tells the truth then who is really going to want to have sex with her id she’s lil dicks dont please her?
      3. She’s trying to escape with out facing any repercussions, however she’s still trying control the situation.

  2. I agree with Kate. After so many year she the mans penis is an issue?
    The writer has already broken the trust by cheating. She could have discussed the problem with her man before but she didn’t, rather she chose to go outside the relationship.

    After two kids most women are not what they used to be before the births. Did she ever consider that aspect as well? It may be that she’s bored and is looking for something fresh and new. If she really loves the man as she claims , talking about it first would have been the best option before being unfaithful.

  3. Kate need to go jump off a cliff and don’t give advice to anyone because I don’t know what type of response was that. Kate sound like is her boyfriend doing the cheating with Winny. This response was tasteless and should be removed. Kate sound like she desperately needs a man.

  4. Leave kate alone. I totally agree with her. Winny is ungrateful. A man who respects and is faithful to you and you still cheating on him. She dint kno his dick was small when she went there.

  5. Winny should have gotten some sex aids (toys) to help with the sexual part of the relationship and not cheat on this wonderful boyfriend who tries his best to please her in ways that he could.

  6. I feel kate is right. De gyal pork is too spacious. Think SPACE…. like infinite size and depth!! Try some of those yoga exercises. Keigels or whatever they are to tighten that gaping cavern up a bit. Kate, i find you could have suggested some toning (I mean tightening that thing up). Anyway, the seed was fine before she cheated so something has changed. Apart from the vastness of her love box, maybe the girth and length of her side man may be an issue too. We need more info and hopefully we can get a reply from the cheater.

  7. Several issues here, but I’ll start with the main one which is the horrifically biased and sexist response that Kate gave. Rather than giving an intelligent, objective response, it was dangerously narrowminded and sexist. Note: I’m in no way condoning, agreeing with, or justifying her behavior. I think her cheating was wrong.

    Second: Kate’s response is indicative of the core problem with the writer’s situation, and our community as a whole; the fear/lack of open, and honest communication, particularly around sex and emotions. Yes, these conversations are not always comfortable, but if we were more open and used to it, rather than it being taboo – this shit would happen less, and this disgusting response by Kate wouldn’t have even come to mind.

    Had this been a man who wrote it, the response would have been drastically different, maybe, MAYBE might have included some actual advise.

    • I think you misunderstand. Yes Kate’s response was sexist, but I think the point was to demonstrate how obsessions over penis size are just as damaging as obsessions over vaginal tightness. Both are negative societal standards. It was a brutal answer for a shallow question, and I think there was value to that.

    • How is her response sexist? So someone can says guys penis is small, but can’t say a woman’s vagina is big? There’s many different size vaginas just like penis’. Someone can say a guys dick size is a problem, but once it’s a vagina size issue then it’s sexist? Give me a break and stop your virtue signaling. Everyone in the real world is sick of it.
      Facts; she cheated on her boyfriend who most likely fathered her children, and share a home together. Who, as stated by her, is a great spouse. Yet she did the worst thing possible and CHEATED for the sole reason of size.

      If a guy cheated because a woman’s boobs were too small, you’d yell sexist.

      Get off your high horse

  8. I think this lady is lying to herself or just lying period—I do not think she is in love with the man she claims she loves at all..I think she is in love with the material things he can provide her with..Men sometimes may stray just for the thrill of it,but when a woman is in Love with a man,she has no eyes for anyone else.. Unless of course she is a Sex maniac

    • Suzie-She does not have to endure if its really affecting her.She should leave,not keep him on the side for whatever gain she may be getting.

  9. I once dated a guy with what I considered a small penis…I dreaded sex time also he sukked on my titts so hard …i hated sex wid him plus he ejaculated within 4mins…(I actually timed him)….but he was my 1st boyfriend and 1st sex partner and I LOVE HIM never once did I cheated(never even crossed my mind) ..he had the GALL to CHEAT ….what kate said was not positive …but how you politely tell a guy ur NOT satisfying me its like would ANY woman like to hear (you porkie stinks n ur not gripping my dik)….but CHEATING on him isnt right …if you carnt bear to tell him write it and say at the end ….WILLING TO TRY OTHER Methods …backshot isnt ur fren…

  10. I applaud Kate’s response. This Winny obviously doesn’t love her boyfriend or she would never have cheated on him. That’s one of the cruelest, most despicable things that a woman can ever do to a man. Kate justifiably lambasted her for her inexcusable behavior. Winny is totally clueless regarding what the word “love” truly means. He should divorce her and find a woman who who really is caring. compassionate, loving and would never hurt a man in such an abominable way. Obviously, Winny has proven she is not that woman and deserves to be alone.

  11. The average woman vagina is like 4-5 inches… and less in width. The average penis is bigger than both of those. If chick find her guys dick too small… I would hate to break it to her, but it’s probably more likely that she’s too gaping, because the average man should be more than enough for the average woman (unless of course the average woman has a gaping vagina or wants abnormally large things inside of her, in which case it is absolutely an issue with the girl and her unrealistic expectations.

    And before anyone tries to shame me for saying this by making fun of my junk… keep in mind, I’ll just turn around and make fun of you for having a gaping vagina. Saggy ass tits (if not now, eventually) and remind you that you’re simply projecting hate. I’m a woman… so I don’t have a penis… make fun of it all you want. lmao.

  12. I am a very attractive white male, nice body and 6.5 cut and thicker then average. I got my GF a massage for her birthday, nice hotel suite, and arranged for a 25 year old guy for come to the room.
    He was very attractive, I arranged for a special massage with him before he arrived because my GF used to have a BF that was hung, and she admits sometimes she misses it sometimes. He started rubbing her and then slipped off his shorts and looked at me for the ok, my gf was already nude. He pulled them down and exposed a very thick 8.5 in tool. He then laid it on cheek and see opened her eyes and smiled. She had him in her mouth in seconds and needless to say he jumped on top of her slammed her for 30 mins, she came 6-7 times see said. A couple times a year we book him and she thanks me for 2 weeks afterwards, I knew she had a itch, so I scratched it for her…your reader might want to talk to her BF about a “treat” every once ion a while…

    • “Dave” lol what a sad excuse for a man. Keep on cucking so other dudes can tail your woman. I PROMISE you he’s not the only one.

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