DEAR KATE: My boyfriend won’t give me his password


My boyfriend and I have been together for about four years now. We do love each other very much and have even been thinking of getting married.

However, there is one problem. He flatly refuses to give me his Facebook password. I have begged, asked, supplicated but to no avail.

What is burning me is the fact that I give him the passwords for everything I have: Facebook, email, Messenger, Skype, you name it.

But whenever it comes to his Facebook password, it is another story. He turns and twists me around. He said he is not doing anything bad and I should trust him.

I have tried on many occassions to hack into his Facebook using common password which I think he might use, but none has been successful so far.

I am getting very frustrated at this.

My question is, is it wrong to ask for his Facebook password?

Angry and Mad

Dear Angry and Mad,

I don’t see the reason why you should be giving yourself such a headache over a Facebook password. No matter how intimate people might get they still do need some privacy, some personal space. There is a certain limit to your together-ness. You two can be together in many aspects but you must also realize that the two of you are entitled to your own person life.

You should not feel compelled to give him any of your passwords either because you also need your personal space.

Now, I do sense an issue of trust and in insecurity here and for the sake of the relationship you need to take a look at that. What is the source of your insecurity? Has he done anything to you in the past? Has he cheated?

If not, there is no reason to be losing sleep over a Facebook password.


Advertise with the mоѕt vіѕіtеd nеwѕ ѕіtе іn Antigua!
We offer fully customizable and flexible digital marketing packages.
Contact us at [email protected]


  1. I feel like I wasted my excitement for this week’s “Dear Kate.” Girl gyou need to get yo’ life being all bent outta shape over a silly password.

  2. Unless it’s the password for a shared online bank account or something of that nature, he is NOT obligated to breach his privacy. It’s called a password for a reason.

  3. My dear you need to ask yourself:
    -Why do I need his FB Password?
    – How will this information will benefit me?
    – How will it improve the fabric on my relationship?

    If you have insecurity issues with a simple matter as a face book password, I can not imagine what will happen after you were to get married. I think you should evaluate your behavior and move on to more important things.

  4. Well if both of you are frens on Facebook you can see who comments & like .and tag him in post…

    As for his messages and thats what YOU really want

    If husband nar gee wife password ah gf or oman
    Gyal get a life…

    We WOMAN always giving man full acess to our lives ….y u gave him urs (cos u have mothing to hide right) dammmmmm fool…serve you right ……. change ALL your passwords n level the playing field.

    I give
    as much as i GET

  5. easy he has another woman plain and simple. ….so just relax …all men got multiple women they talking to and engaging in sextual talk and ALL MEN and never let anyone tells u differently. …..hey and women also everyone need to put that in the back of their head all women and men cheat,and if u believe that cheating starts with u putting a snake in a circle then u have not really lived.some ladies would say they never cheated but be talking to a male friend about sexual exploits a smart guy know if he only get that opportunity to get close to this lady she will be cheating like kids in a classroom doing a test when the teacher left to get more men and women everyone is going to do some side shit, so you trying to tell me that out of 12 billion people u the only one she likes or vise versa really,when that right person comes around and Holla at her out of the 1000th that said hi to her u better believe she sharing that number and then u know what happens after that…..females get tired of the same guy after sometime it varies for different ladies they love newness, and every girl got that picture of what her husband or boyfriend should look like when they grow up men also,trust me he/she is out there and that is implanted in her head…….so people everybody will cheat it is plain and simple and the one who say they dont or will never will their relationships have a very short life span those are the girls you would see in 2 or more relationships in a year because that is when she starts talking to someone new and it is time to get it down so she leave your ass ……so people be real and open up …..

    • Uhm. I just happen to disagree. I am a woman and I don’t cheat. I am very open about everything. I have absolutely nothing to hide at all. I agree with the men’s part, but as a woman I would have to disagree. Yes, we may have the image of a perfect guy in our heads but even if it were to come a time where I seen someone like my “Perfect Guy” I wouldn’t leave my partner for him. Not all good looking guys have the best heart. Those are the one’s who can get any girl in an instant and they’ll take us women for granted. Periodt.

  6. He’s probably protecting you from overreacting after reading messages from women who surely chase after him. In his heart he’s not interested but by u seeing them it may bring some sort of insecurity which he clearly does not want as it would ruin the relationship. Focus on other things like loving yourself than nagging him about a password u may just ruin your chances of losing a good one. I agree with d nice don’t be so open. U sound like you’re going crazy and that’s not normal.

  7. I look at this differently. I can agree that passwords for work and other confidential matters cannot be shared. But I CANNOT see the reason why a mate has a problem sharing their social media passwords their loved one. To me when that is not done it is to hide something. I believe when a mate is open they naturally are given their privacy and freedom by the other mate because they give no reason for speculation, they are not fighting to hide anything. I believe most couples who are open with each other, even sharing their social media passwords, do not even check each others social media accounts, it does not even cross their mind, or check up on their mates, because they are proving their trust worthiness to each other. Like love, trustworthiness is something that one has to continually work to demonstrate to the other; we cannot just expect one to continually trust us if we do not continually work to prove our trust.

  8. To me if he is hiding something as simple as a social media password, he will probably hide other things. So I’ll take that as a sign to look for someone else who is trustworthy. DO NOT continue to stress yourself with that because the same thing will happen with more important things. Who is unfaithful with what is least is unfaithful with what is much.

  9. I can tell he’s a good guy. You just need to mind your business. Go get a pet if you want someone to spy on.

Comments are closed.