Dear Kate,
I really feel uncomfortable writing this but it’s something I can’t stop thinking about.
I caught my boyfriend sniffing my 14-year-old daughter’s underwear in the bathroom. I know what I saw Kate, but he tells me it fell and he was hanging it out. I don’t want to judge him lest I get punished by the Lord.
Kate, we have been together for five years. My daughter was nine when we met and he’s like a father to her. I don’t know what to make of it.
I feel so uncomfortable even asking my daughter if he ever touched her inappropriately. I don’t know if I should let it go but he’s always had a special kind of love for her.
I just took it to mean it was because he loved me he loved my child. What should I do?
Confused.
Dear Confused,
You need to make sure that what you saw was actually correct.
And if it is, then you need to speak to your daughter who will most likely confirm if it’s true and vice versa.
She is 14 and is totally aware of her sexuality and would be able to say if she was ever taken advantage of by the man who played the father role for several years.
Let’s deal with the worst part first. If it is so that your common-law boyfriend had sexually abused your daughter or even attempted to speak or talk to her inappropriately, then you need to report it to the police and take it from there.
However, if this is not the case, you would need to apologize to him while letting him know how you feel and why you had these concerns.
I cannot and will not advise you to leave your companion because he could have really been just “hanging out the underwear” but it wouldn’t hurt to always be on the alert for predators.
You mentioned not wanting to be punished by the Lord. I take it to mean that you fear the Lord. And based on that I will ask that you trust him as well.
Take comfort in this : Mark 4:22 “For nothing is hidden, except to be revealed; nor has anything been secret, but that it would come to light.
Kate
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“You need to make sure that what you saw was actually correct.”
Excuse me?? To hang something out you don’t need to bring it to your face AT ALL.
She opens the letter saying she knows what she saw and she very much seems to think that he’s lying.
If she already has that conviction, next step should be talking to her daughter. Not in an accusatory way but ask her the question and if she says it happened, believe her. Not him. This is not the kind of chance you want to take with your child, lady. We do not give benefit of the doubt where sexual abuse of children is concerned. How much more do you think the Lord would punish you for that?
Disappointed by your weak answer, Kate.
Completely agree with The New Grassroots. It’s answers like the one you just gave that leave our children at risk for abuse. You’ve basically said “check with him and if he says he didn’t do it, say sorry for thinking he did and move on.” WHAT?
Helping people deal with potential abuse is not your forte, and you need to pass on answering these questions or get assistance before you do. She should speak to her child. NOW. And she should do it with a professional trained in it. A counselor or priest. Everything else flows from that.
An epic FAIL on this answer.
Orrrr je could be sniffing it to zee IF she’s already sexually active……fear is the devils playground…STOP thinking n start ASKING..Take her oit the house away from him n casually ask her…be kool abt your approach..
Asking either of them is a waste of time, just like ‘asking Kate’ who is a stupid b*tch and so are you for asking her. YES! He was smelling the teenage panties! Of course you stupid c%nt! He is a man, and biologically he is attracted to a young fertile member of the opposite sex that is not his genetic offspring. This doesn’t mean that they are fuck*ng, but realistically, if they are not, they both want to be. Just realize that we are all just animals, and this is not predatory behavior like C%nt Kate would say, but PERFECTLY natural, and there is NO LORD. Christianity is just stupid shit your parents tricked you with like the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus and you should know better you stupid b*tch.
It truly isn’t natural to sniff panties of your daughter, and it isn’t natural to have sex with your offspring. Have you seen an animal having sex with their girlfriends child? No! Animals don’t even have girlfriends and do not mate with other animals that aren’t ready to mate. Also there are gay people too!
^^ best answer ever! The only one with common sense here.
He wants to fuck her. They probably are fucking. Dating a mum with a 9 yr old? So much baggage… he was probably always a pedo, living in hevean with a dumb as post church retard and her hot daughter.
This is a conversation that should be solicited but isn’t. It’s not even tolerated. The one to bring it up is castigated. 30 years from now . . . what fools we once were.
Dear confused Kate,
EITHER YOU’RE OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND OR YOU REALLY DID ENJOY THE WAY YOUR DADDY PLAYED WITH YOUR LITTLE KITTY CAT!!!!
YOU ARE A SICK BITCH TO TELL A MOTHER THAT IS CONCERNED ABOUT HER DAUGHTER, TO APOLOGIZE TO THIS SICK ASS MF MONSTER!!!
YOU SHOULD NOT BE ADVISING ANYONE ON WHAT THEY NEED TO BE DOING.!!!
YOU ARE THE ONE THAT NEEDS OUR PROFESSIONAL HELP!!!
HERE IS ADVICE… TAKE A BUNCH OF PILLS AND GO TO SLEEP 😆
PLEEEEESE!!!!!!
Maybe your flower is not fragrant and the daughters is. Once through puberty fragrance peaks as sexual signals. He might have been reminiscing from when he was younger. My guess is that he would not touch your daughter if he loves her and is a kind person. You have more to worry about if she is a horny type who would seduce him – if she is hot it would be hard to resist and would be a crime, but the sniffing is not a crime. You can turn him into your slave if you put her panties on his face while you are having sex with him – most likely the ultimate fantasy! He will tell you it is just fantasy like we all have and if he loves you he would not touch your daughter. If he is a narcissist type of self centered then I would watch the relationship between them for clues, but it would be bad to confront the daughter without evidence because it would create doubt and uneasiness.
Probably he was inhaling your daughter’s pantie-stink because she has the AIDS which she got from Kate who first took it up the anus hole when she was 9 and the priest told her it made her closer to Jesus if she pulled her butt cheeks wide for him and now Kate is retarded in the chocolate starfish area and loves Jesus even though he died on a cross so priests could be pedofiles and the pope could put his fingers in boys’ rectums then sniff them then give Mass.
I am 34 yrs old. I sniffed the dirty thong of my 44 yr old girlfriends 19 yr old niece and they smelled like butt and were delicious. The 19 yr old niece caught me asked me what the fuck I was doing and I told her that I wanted to know what her butt smelled like so she said ok pulled her pants down & let me smell it for real. That was in 2008. Now we have been married for 11 yrs and have 3 children together. Yes it may sound sick and perverted but it was a situation that we both agreed on and she was of legal age. But a 14 yr old? That is pedophilia.
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