DEAR KATE: Her rasta boyfriend made her stop using deodorant


Dear Kate,

My best friend is in a relationship with a Rasta man and she’s becoming too roots for my liking. He controls her. She can no longer eat meat, wear makeup, dress girly and just be cool like we use to.

Now she stopped using deodorant and she stinks. She literally smells like snake oil or something like that.

I understand its okay to probably move away from the false lashes and weaves but to stop using deodorant is taking it to another level.

Seriously speaking this man has changed my friend like for the worst and when I speak to her about it, she told me to mind my business. Do you think I should really stay out?

Amy Pit

Dear Amy Pit,

Your friend is an adult and perhaps you should stay out as she requested. Unless the individual is a minor, they can choose to do what they want to do with their lives and bodies.

Of course, there are consequences but we all have choices to make.

I understand you care for her and see a bigger picture but sometimes, well most times, the heart wants what the heart wants.

And if your friend is comfortable in her Rastafarian lifestyle then just be content that she is being who she wants to be.

Love your friend and respect her choices.


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  1. Man is problem, leave her alone until they break up, she’ll go back to old time ways and y’all can be friends again

  2. Amy Pit find yourself some business or send your friend a dozen lemons with a note about using lemons to make either lemonade or stop the frousy.
    I think her Man is being loving and caring by having her not use deodorant as it’s been known to cause cancers.
    When you go around her simply walk with a clothes pin and pin ya nose maybe she will get the hint.

  3. Is the issue the changes this best friend has made or is it the rastaman. Nothing is wrong with being natural, not eating meat or not wearing a “deodorant” (once there is a replacement that works). She can try lime. That would cut the odour. Most deodorants contain Aluminum which can be harmful. As long as she is not being forced against her will…that’s what matters because if that’s the case perhaps one day she will be unhappy.

  4. How about being your friend’s friend. A true friend will still be a friend no matter what type of relationship or how she changes Maybe now is the time she needs you most.

  5. There’s a natural deodorant called the Thai Crystal. It’s made out of natural mineral salts. The salts kill the bacteria that cause the odor. It really works, you just wet it and rub it in your armpit after you wash. It takes two weeks to notice that the smell is gone. You can find it marketed under other names but they will always include the word crystal. In the states you find it in the natural market or even at discount retailers like Marshall’s. Hope this helps!

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