Humpty Dumpty Cutie: Sitting Pretty on the Wall of Missing Persons
We all know the old, infamous nursery rhyme:
“Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall,
All the king’s horses and all the king’s men,
Couldn’t put Humpty together again.”
Currently, in a land of sun, sea, and an ever-growing list of missing persons, there sits a Humpty Dumpty. Not the beloved egg of nursery rhyme fame, but a real-life political marvel of gross ineptitude, Sir Humpty Dumpty Cutie. Majestically perched atop his ministerial wall, he surveys the kingdom, ever concerned with the grand illusion of action and love, yet somehow doing the bare minimum. And as he adjusts his crown and fine-tunes his rhetoric, citizens keep vanishing like sand slipping through fingers at the beach with each passing wave.
Living abroad and also with a relative missing, my heart aches tremendously for my country and family. More so, I am sad to learn that Orden “Passo” David, an LGBTQ+ and sexual health advocate who brought joy to the lives of family and friends, is now gone. Antigua and Barbuda faces a chilling reality: over 50 officially reported missing persons and more than 100 unresolved homicides. Nearly 200 souls lost in a nation of just 108 square miles and a population barely scratching 100,000. And yet, Humpty Dumpty Cutie remains as unmoved as an unseasoned bowl of pepperpot.
There have been no press conferences, no national security overhauls, no impassioned pleas for justice—just silence. If his leadership were a lighthouse on Sandy Island, it would be powered by candlelight, which is dim, inconsistent, and wholly unreliable.
Also, we must marvel at the irony: in a ministry unable to resolve these mass disappearances, the biggest vanishing act is the minister himself. Like Houdini with a knighthood, Humpty Dumpty Cutie and his esteemed entourage are experts at dodging the very issues they are paid to address with no sight of worthy policy solutions. Reports, strategies, and meaningful policies? Invisible! But what we get are PR stunts, his officers racking up frequent flyer miles, and a level of apathy so profound that it makes the devil more interested in the people of the earth.
Meanwhile, in Trinidad, alarms have been sounded over human trafficking networks snatching citizens off the streets. Could the same be happening here? Who knows? Certainly not Humpty Dumpty Cutie, who is too busy at his mansion on the hilltop and ensuring his offspring are well-positioned for wealth creation while the security of the people crumbles.
The ministry under his watch is a symphony of mediocrity. The police force is under-resourced, the prison system is not even fit for rats, and the court backlogs are only now becoming unclogged like the last hour of Friday night fish fry. Furthermore, the one instance of crime reduction came not from Humpty Dumpty’s genius, but from the Prime Minister’s direct intervention in quashing gang violence.
A portfolio so underwhelming it could be mistaken for diet rice pudding, Humpty Dumpty Cutie is on the verge of a spectacular political fall. And when it happens, not even all the king’s horses and all the king’s men will be able to put his shattered credibility back together again.
Before his inevitable descent from the wall of mediocrity, perhaps he should be schooled and given lifesaving measures:
- Establish a Missing Persons’ Task Force with police, ONDCP, social workers, mental health specialists, and civil society groups
- Incentivise establishing more Community Watch Groups and setting up Community Alert Systems
- Install CCTV cameras in strategic locations across the country and harness modern technology for proactive policing
- Partner with telecommunications companies to facilitate court-authorized tracking
- Strengthen regional cooperation to prevent criminal migration
- Root out bias, corruption, homophobia, and misogyny from law enforcement agencies
- Create a centralised database with real-time updates on missing persons and crime trends
- Launch a public education campaign on safety, crime prevention, and community policing
If Humpty Dumpty Cutie truly values his knighthood and the people it was meant to honour, he must act now. Every missing person is another crack in his legacy, another name etched in the growing ledger of those abandoned by the state. If he cannot or will not lead, then, for the love of all that is good and decent, he should step down before gravity does the job for him.
Time to get off the wall, Humpty Dumpty Cutie!
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A literary masterpiece. I concur
Cutie sad sad your kids nuff and feel they’re above the law and better than everybody else.
Well said writer!👏 F*ck dem up Yes!!!
That’s the quality of the opposing minds in my beloved Country; the creed of the Opposition forces sound more and more desperate with each passing day. Absolutely nothing to stimulate the mind all in an effort to keep the poor and ignorant in their comfort zone of misery, hate, foul language and coveteousness. So sad for a country that offers up to university level education to its people!
Bringing attention to the handling of missing persons cases is necessary, and this piece does a good job of sparking discussion on the matter. It’s true that some cases seem to receive more urgency than others, which raises valid concerns about fairness in media and law enforcement priorities. That said, the choice of a playful metaphor like “Humpty Dumpty Cutie” may not sit well with everyone, as it could be seen as trivializing a serious issue. A more measured approach might make the argument even stronger.
While creative writing can be effective, it’s crucial to ensure that the message does not overshadow the sensitivity of the subject matter.