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Dear Editor,
I was sexually abused, by my aunt’s husband.
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My mom died when I was 10.
At that time my dad was incarcerated, and I was sent to live with my aunt, my mom’s sister. As a child I thought so highly of my aunt, and I always wanted to be around her.
However when I was 13, the old man she had been seeing came home from prison, and straight into our home. His grooming began with gifts, money, and manipulation.
He undermined his wife’s rules when I was punished, by secretly giving me access to things such as phone and computer use, and told me to keep it between us.
Over time his behavior escalated.
He began making sexual remarks about my underwear drying on the clothesline and violated my privacy by searching through my belongings, including my purse and digital camera to look at my photos.
When my aunt was upstairs sleep, he would have me come downstairs to sit on his lap and he’d molest me.
One day he asked me to sit on his private area and In that moment, I realized what was happening to me was wrong.
I wrote a letter to my aunt explaining the incident and told her how uncomfortable I felt. I’m not sure how she responded, but I do recall being sent to stay with her daughter for a short period afterward.
While I was living with her daughter, I opened up to her about what happened. She became my only real source of support. When I returned home, he was still there and the sexual abuse continued. I stayed silent because after the first time, nothing had been done to protect me.
The abuse continued from age 13, until I was 17. Whenever I lashed out, my aunt would shut me down saying I wasn’t going to ruin her marriage, and that I needed to respect her husband. When I turned 18, a simple mistake leaving a towel on the bathroom floor turned into a huge argument.
Her husband defended me, and in response, she kicked me out and sent me to live with my grandmother.
It wasn’t until I grew up and became a mother myself, that I fully understood just how badly I had been treated. As an adult, I was present when my aunt told her mother, that her uncle (my grandmother’s brother) had sexually abused her.
My grandmother called her a liar and made her cry.
In that moment, I realized that her behavior was learned, a generational curse. When I reached out to her as an adult to share how this situation had affected me, she ignored my message and told our entire family that I was lying.
Her daughter that I confided in has also turned her back on me, pretending she doesn’t remember what happened.
My maternal grandmother turned on me as well.
She has no relationship with me or my children, because I spoke up. 7 years have passed, and my aunt still hasn’t taken any accountability, yet she still sleeps with a pedophile every night.
Sadly my mother thought she could trust her to take care of me in her demise.
I’m thankful that my children don’t have to endure the trauma that I endured. As a mother, I promise to always be a voice for my children, and shield them from harm.
#TellSomebody
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What an awful story. I’m so sorry you had to deal with betrayal and mistrust on your family. I am happy to hear you found healing and you are now speaking out about the abuse you endured. Keep you head up and protect your babies.
I’m happy you turned your pain into a voice of triumph over tragedy. I pray this article helps at least one child in distress to speak up and to get the help they need.
It’s time to end child abuse.
It is so heartbreaking to know that this is happening to do many innocent children. Adults please listen and help. Stop telling them they are lying.
If they can’t trust us, who can they trust?
So sorry for your demise but I know exactly how you feel,im also very protective of my children because of that my mother gave a blind eye to the situation until I lashed out but thank God when I lashed out he stopped because I lashed out in my house and the neighbors got to know and I make sure i instill in my children not to accept no abuse from no one cause im there for them im very over protective and I’ll stay that way until they are adults to make their own decisions
So sorry to hear of this but Kudos to you for standing up and making a difference by speaking out and breaking that chain in Jesus name, I pray for your healing continually mental, emotional, physical and spiritual, continue being that strong person you are especially for the next generation,God bless
How are you? I am sorry for what you have experienced and I am so inspired by your coning forward with this information. I want you to know that people exist who support you and will stand beside you. I know this is traumatic and you will never forget, I do pray you get all you need and want to deal with this trauma. If there is anything I can do, I would do, and not just offer encouraging words. You deserve and need much more than words.
You are such a strong person and I pray you do not let this negatively affect you and your children. Never let criminals win by not only victimize you but stopping you and your family from living a good and healthy life. Thank you for your letter.
It will continue to happen because we protect the family members and the sick individuals. If I was the one writing that letter all names would have been mentioned, it has already happened so feeling shame goes out the windows. These kinds of people live life like they are the epitome of good when they are the devil in disguise. I pray God gives you the healing you need. Don’t trust anybody with your kids, absolutely no one.
@Marryn. Indeed. Those names especially that pedophile would be in capital letters. Them must shame fu mingle in society!!!
Why are you writing this and not calling names? It doesn’t make sense to me that you are still protecting your family. You should call all the names, go back and write again and call all the names then what you have written will make sense. No need to feel ashamed you did nothing wrong. CALL THE NAMES.
They seems to be high level of sexual abuse within the Caribbean. Many are suffering in silence. For those of you who said that she should call names, I want you to know that this type of situation comes with a lot of shame that is why most of her family members pretend that it didnot happen. Sometimes the shame is so unbearable that it leads to major depression.See what happened to one of the whistleblower in the Jeffrey Epstein cast that became public.
vigilante justice…the emergency room better have good walls cause I next will come for him!!!!
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